Selective Blindness

S E L E C T I V E B L I N D N E S S.

This is what I call the ability to look past something that doesn’t look the way you want it to. You may be aware of its presence but, because you don’t accept the way it looks, you look past it. It’s just another way of blocking your blessings.

If anyone is guilty of having this ailment, it’s me. But, today, it hit me like “EUREKA!”

So often, I’ve complained and moped about how I’ll never know the love I give to others (which is already shameful in itself). I've gone as far as to tell myself that I think some people are meant to give but are never intended to receive love on a grand scale. How did I even come to that conclusion? Against which standard have I been measuring my nonsense? I am so guilty of looking past all the love the universe has been sending to me. Everything we desire, everything we manifest, can truly come to be. I believe that. But I couldn't seem to believe I'm receiving abundant love?

Now, don't get me wrong, I don’t love and give to others looking for reciprocity. I do and give all of that because that's who I am as a person. Always have been and always will be. But I’m also human. And we all want to be loved.

I know the love I give is immense. It’s immeasurable. And because I've manifested boundless love, I’ve been receiving it— it just hasn’t come dressed in the form of romantic love (my preference up until this revelation). First, if I want boundless love for myself, I need to love myself that way before I can expect anyone else to. Once I figured that out, I also saw that the universe has returned love to me, ten-fold, through my friends and family. I've received love I'm undeserving of. It's really amazing and I feel awful just now seeing it all so clearly.

.

For real, y’all! I’ve been a brat. It hit me today when a friend from church messaged me saying I’d been on her mind and she wanted me to know both she and God BIG love me. I was speechless. I was touched. I felt really sad that it took getting this message for me to really see that I do have love pouring into me from every corner of the universe. BIG love. HUGE love REAL love. Love I've asked for and love I haven't -- all love I don’t deserve.

From God and from people. My best friend ordered pizza for me last night (she lives in Florida) because I was hungry. That is HUGE love. Boundless and selfless. A friend sent me scripture last week and reached out to encourage me because God placed it on his heart to do so. That is HUGE love. Another of my best friends called me from the airport last night. She’d just got back from a cruise out of the country and wanted me to know she was back and would be flying back home. She simply wanted to ask about my holidays and check on me. That is BIG love. And I’ve got good friends and family supporting me daily -- every step of the way. That is inexhaustible love.

.

And, yet, here I was chalking bottomless love up to a romantic deficit. The nerve of me.

Don't be like me. Open your eyes. See the bigger picture.

Don't block your blessings or deny yourself the goodness meant for you in this life just because it doesn't show up dressed like your expectations. See everything for what it truly is and appreciate it as it is before it all slips away.

I'm so glad I got my vision back today. That, or I finally opened my eyes.

Xoxo